THE EVENING CHRONIC

• Happy Birthday to Trulyfab From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (86 days old)

  Today is Donna's birthday. Let's all wish her Many Happy Returns and hope she has a good day. XXX… more

• Scotland – The rebellious teenager ? From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (88 days old)

  Often when teenagers feel repressed they are compelled to make a huge statement, like having their heads pierced or tattooing their genitals. The more dramatic and controversial they are, the greater … more

• Tyred ladybird From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (102 days old)

  Have you checked your tread lately?… more

• Blog Hijackers From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (102 days old)

  The recent increase in spammers and non-blog publishers is causing many genuine bloggers to leave this site. At any given time the browser can be 80% full of cheapskates trying for free advertising an… more

• Close shave on eBay From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (104 days old)

  I was invited to a fancy dress party, and went on eBay to look for a Mickey Mouse outfit. I almost ended up buying the England cricket team. Fortunately I was outbid at the last minute by Ricky Pontin… more

• CPS slips on a 25p banana skin From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (106 days old)

  A man was acquitted by a jury of stealing a banana worth 25p. The trial cost the taxpayer £20,000 and the CPS defended there decision to prosecute the case saying that they had enough evidence to secu… more

• Compensation From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (111 days old)

  Compensation = recompense = reimbursement = reparation = money for loss Could someone explain to me how a soldier can lose a limb and have to fight for compensation yet an MP can travel to work and… more

• Gluttony From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (156 days old)

  I’ll tell you a story of hunger and greed of people who always take more than they need Who grab what they can when there’s no-one about and fill up their pockets while some go without They thin… more

• The boy stood on the burning deck From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (158 days old)

  The boy stood on the burning deck When all but he had fled Financial crisis round his neck No answer in his head The country was in quite a mess His pals had all resigned A tangled web of naug… more

• Police brutality From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (159 days old)

  A police officer needs to exercise restraint otherwise he is nothing but a thug. Punching a victim around the head whilst he is under the effects of a taser and restrained by other officers is not the… more

• Stormtroopers? From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (160 days old)

  Having just watched a video of a Nottingham man being tasered by police, I must say that I find it disturbing. Four officers are seen to be brutally attacking the guy whilst he rolls on the ground, ap… more

• Six of the best From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (162 days old)

  … more

• Looking From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (164 days old)

  looked in the fridge, nothing there same in the cupboard looked in the bank, nothing there same in my pocket looked in my diary, nothing there same in my life looked in the future, nothing there… more

• Ode to a feather duster From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (176 days old)

  Springtime, pantomime shift the grime, rid the slime half-time is playtime grab a coke, have a smoke mustn't shirk, back to work one more burst, done the worst scrub and scour, elbow power half… more

• This chick has got a real shoe fetish From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (176 days old)

  But I love her all the same. … more

• Could this be my dream bird? From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (177 days old)

  Some kids brought this round today and asked me for £1 for them rescuing it. I think it's a blackbird or a starling Question is, should I have tried to knock them down to 50p … more

• Proposition 8 From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (177 days old)

  In May 2008, the California Supreme Court ruled that state law prohibiting same-sex marriage was unconstitutional, but in November last year, voters passed Proposition 8, which amended the state const… more

• Hello darling, can I check your immunity genes From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (181 days old)

  A recent survey has suggested that people are more attracted to those who have very different immunity genes from their own. Apparently, a group of genes known as the major histocompatibility complex … more

• A cure for hiccups From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (182 days old)

  I’ve noticed an increase lately in the number of blogists whose posts contain stories of depression and misery about their situation. Many are teenagers who seem to be crying out for help or guidance … more

• MPs suicide From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (183 days old)

  Conservative frontbencher Nadine Dorries has claimed that the row over expenses could drive some MPs to commit suicide. Mmmm! I see a subject for a reality TV show there. They could call it Big Smo… more

• Police State? From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (183 days old)

  “The term police state describes a state in which the government exercises rigid and repressive controls over the social, economic and political life of the population.” Does this sound familiar? T… more

• Arrest, what arrest From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (184 days old)

  My friend Norman stopped by today to give me an update on his criminal activities. The gash on his arm is healing nicely, and his wrists are recovering from the over-tight handcuffing. He still has a … more

• Unrequited Love From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (185 days old)

  A poem by Lord Bunion to his sweetheart Lady Isabella Dandruff Here is a poem what I wrote So short, and yet so simple I’d rather have you on my lips Than a cold-sore or a pimple … more

• Art for arts sake From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (186 days old)

  My friend Norman was arrested last Tuesday. He had been out collecting raw material for his latest project, a rather ambitious morph that required plenty of snapshots of people, places and things. Thr… more

• More leaked documents From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (197 days old)

  Copy of a letter to the House of the Commons Dear Harryette I have been looking at the new cellulite reducing body stocking, and I wondered if I could pay for one out of my MPs allowance seeing as… more

• Yet another leaked conversation From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (197 days old)

  Overheard in a bar near Westminster Rodney I say Giles, did you hear about Johnny Prescott spending his MPs allowance on mock-Tudor beams for his house? Giles I think he ought to be horse whip… more

• A leaked document From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (197 days old)

  Copy of a letter from Jaqui Smith to her lawyers: Mr A. Mountebank Pecksniff Pinchbeck & Pettifog London Dear Mr Mountebank My husband has recently developed tennis elbow using a produ… more

• Rabbit's bedding From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (197 days old)

  In a recent survey 40% of car drivers, when asked by their mechanic to hand them a rag, chose the Daily Telegraph… more

• A Speedy Solution From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (199 days old)

  I read recently that the government are thinking of bringing the speed limit down in built-up areas and on country roads and they tell us it’s to cut accidents and save lives. Now whether it’s drinkin… more

• Long life People (Refrigerate after opening and use within 3 days) From Tin-man in THE EVENING CHRONIC (199 days old)

  After extensive research a professor from Manchester University has made the startling discovery that rich people live longer. Well bravo to you mister professor; please award yourself a purple star. … more

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